PDRM - Pengemis Diraja Malaysia

An office was burglarized. So the company sent their people to a police station to make a police report. This is a very normal procedure, it is the least that any company will do when such thing happens. However what happen next is definitely not what anyone would expect to happen.

At the police station, one of them told the policemen that they wanted to report on a burglary at their office. Can you guess what the policemen ask them instead? Those fat lazy ass ask them why do they want to make a report of it. "Buat apa you mau report?"

Can you believe this shit? There is more to it. After the report was made, those fat lazy ass went to the company to have a look. They are suppose to survey the loses and look for any clue which can help solve the case. But NO! Those people walk into the office, saw a pile nice A4 paper and dare to ask the employee if they can take some of it.

As if they are not satisfied with their reputation as corrupted bastards, they now want to make themselves look like a begger, pengemis! Tak tahu malu punya orang!

Our Government Department

Lose your IC and you'll lose your citizenship? link

How ridiculous! How can such thing ever happen? Those lazy fat ass who sits around and busy chit chatting rather than doing a job that they are paid to do should be sent to prison! Maybe...maybe only then can we eliminate such absurd act that has crippled our government department. If it still doesn't work, then we can consider using gun and bullets

swap

*Grandpa was happily playing 'catching' with grandson in the big big house.*

Grandpa: You better run fast, when atuk catch you atuk going to 'kucit-kucit' u.....heheehehee....

Grandson: Oh no.....*sprint away*

Grandpa: Gotcha! kakakaaka......kucit-kucit-kucit-kucit-kucit.....hahahaha.....kucit-kucit-kucit-kucit-kucit.....

Grandson: Argh! No!!!....hahaha....NO!!...ahahaaahaha....tuk...hahahaa....Please stop....hahahah....ahahahahhaaaa....

*Dung! Door was slam open. Both was stunned and stop playing immediately*

Father: Who ask u to simply go swap your job?! Why didnt you consult me first? Are you out of your mind?!!

Grandpa: Who do you think you are to talk to me like this in front of my grandson!? Sit down and we will talk nicely.

Father: Why the hell would you rather play with tanks and C4 than counting cold hard cash? I was just looking at a yatch bigger than Abramovich! Now i can only think about a 70m boat! Thats a fucking sampan!!

Grandpa: What fucking cash u talking about? U really think there is still money left in the coffer? U think i'm fucking stupid huh?!! Let me tell you a secret stupid, there is no fucking money left. Any money that can be transferred, its already in my Liechtenstein bank account.

Father: Ok, so have your money all transferred out. Why is there need for the swap? Who knows there might be more money coming in? Then we will not be able to get those money.

Grandpa: My oh my! i thought you are smarter than this. Look, how long do you think i can remain in my position? You really think i can stay long enough to welcome the new year? For god sake that gay bastard is knocking on my office door! Real son of a bitch!! And when i get kicked out, what do u think the account book will looks like? I dun plan to die in the bloody jail. I will reserved that to somebody else.

Father: Alright, its my fault. Looks like I have underestimated you. I'm sorry. By the way, any chance of you sponsoring the super yatch I wanted to buy? We can go for a family trip in it you know.

Grandpa: It will be under my name.

Father: Whatever you say. And, whats that smell? Smells like shit to me.

Grandpa: Jib, did you poo poo on your pampers?

Grandson: No atuk. See? Its clean. *take down pants and show backside*

Grandpa: Oppss...i think i need to make a trip to the toilet

Father: *whisper* I think grandpa just poo poo in his pampers. Come, papa bring u go eat ice-cream.

Grandson: *whisper* Great, i want chocolate ice-cream!